There’s a kid who works at the Doughnut shop/catch-all kiosk in the center of Salmon Landing, first floor. I think he’s there in the afternoons, as I scoot by with a cart full of salmonberry jelly and toilet paper to take to the boat barn or return after loading a tour. Either way, he has a relatable face. I often say meaningless things as I walk by and he returns the sentiment. 

This week I saw him sitting on a bench outside the building, smoking a cigarette. 

I said “Come on, you’ve given up already?!” 

He said “Huh?”

I said: “You’re smoking, you’ve given up already?”

He said: “Do you live here year round?” I admitted no. Everyone asks that question here to see how legit you are I guess. When you say you don’t, they dismiss you a little bit. But the locals especially do. You get placed in the seasonal category, dropout category, or just transient I s’pose.

But this kid is relatable, he has a charm albeit oddball. He can dismiss me all he wants but I want to help.

I asked him where he was from. He said “Here.”

I said: “Well why don’t you leave?” 

He looked at me: “This place is a fuckin’ vortex.” 

And technically speaking, he’s correct. It’s freakin’ windy, especially on dock one. 

I said: “How old are you?” Exasperated. 

He said “How old do you think I am?” 

That game. 

I said: “19??” Shot in the dark. 

“16” He says, like a prison door slamming on him. That’s the year most kids pine for, not for him I guess.

I threw my hands up in the air. I said “You’re too young to give up!” 

I have become that woman but I don’t care because that woman is right. 

But I’ve been told how hard it is for people to leave, especially people from here. 

You can feel stuck here if you don’t have the resources to get out. Choosing it is an entirely different game, I think. But I also think it’s just an accepted thing for locals to say: “this place is a vortex, it sucks you in” yada yada. 

Conversely, maybe the people who choose this island (seasonals like me) are escaping something instead of pursuing something. Maybe the kids from this island are scared to go, but they want to escape too. In both cases, we’re stuck. 

Either way, smoking is reprehensible for your vocal cords.

But I feel for these kids. I know that it is hard to get off of this island. They fear the “big bad world outside.” If this is the only pace of life you know, then the outside world would slap you in the knee caps.