All aboard the St. Nora! For the whole day.

Second day in a row waking up at 7am. Stank face is like a permanent feature until well after I brush my teeth.

I saw where I’ll be living at the cool taste of $750 a month. It’s dorm style, shoebox shaped rooms with twin beds in each. With what I make hourly, and the cost of airfares, I will make $5 this summer. I’m trying to convince myself this summer isn’t about money. And maybe it isn’t.

Man Overboard: we walked through the necessary steps to getting our guy. Life slings, life rings, all the rhymes.

I’ve become amazed by the Deck Hands job. They know everything about the boats, they are like engine experts. I’ve decided guest services are the worst jobs ever. You are on board serving whiny guests, you can be on a boat that’s “red” (has contracted the “Noro virus” and you have to push retail sales and then clean toilets and pump sewage out of the boot.

I’m a Dock Rep, thank you, I do not relate to sewage except for my own.

Today was both boring and super cool, informative and over my head.

The training itself was none-too-stimulating, however I did get to see the bilge of the boat (that’s the undercarriage). I know there are 9 fire extinguishers on the dock.

We learned the order of appropriate response if something goes awry- calling the captain and finding first aid seem to be top of the list always, unless there’s fire and then we still call the captain. One of our captains I really, really like (retired coast guard), the other, well, blech. Big in his britches and not a very good public speaker at all (in my opinion). But you know what I’ve realized. I wouldn’t want to be guest services for all the jewels in the crown. Who cleans up the vomit on the plane? Them jokers. Serves coffee, sells local jams for a retail bonus, work the cash register, put out fires after people who aren’t supposed to smoke in the bathroom, smoke in the bathroom.

We learned how to de-water the boat (don’t hold me to all the steps or we might sink). We learned how to respond if the boat is sinking.

Funny thing is, neither the other deck rep nor I will actually be on the boats, ever, unless someone doesn’t show up.

We filled out an incident report for a “passenger” who spilled coffee on themselves. I named mine Sandy Martin.

We get to go on tours but not in uniform. That’s pretty fun.

Also I had no idea where the term wheelhouse came from! It’s the ‘cockpit’ of the boat. Never knew where that phrase came from.

The head is the bathroom- what’s up with that?

I learned about Port side and Starboard side. Ship people talk in constant acronyms. PFDs (Personal Floating Devices) EPIRB (Emergency Position Indicating Radio Beacon), ADA (I’d heard so many that I forgot I know what ADA is). This also applies to all sorts of phrases from yesterday, too. Shorex refers to the Shore Excursion Reps from the Cruise Ships. ADC is Alaskan Dream Cruise. BFD still stands for BFD.

We have to look out for Noro Virus which will make us vomit for days. We have to wash our hands after everything we touch.

Listen, if I get that virus I’ll be PEHSSED.

We started with Man Overboard and had to go through all the steps accordingly. There are Life Slings, Life Rings, PFDs (life vests), poles to reach out to the person in the water.

We watched a 2-minute video of a fire spreading in a living room. Gone in 120 seconds. Video was 80s-tastic in every sense but show me training manuals that aren’t.

All day, rocking left to right to left to right slowly, slowly, and I played an experiment to see if I’d get motion sickness. I totally passed! No dizziness at all.

How bizarre to spend all day on a boat that doesn’t leave.

Tomorrow we put out fires (A/B.C), individually, so we can’t wear anything synthetic. Everything I own is synthetic, except my body hair.

I bought Double-Stuf Mint Oreos and managed to only eat three. I bought Rex Goliath and managed to save it for another time. I saw TWO of the 27 people I work with at the Safeway.

I got my fingerprints done for Peace Corps and sent them off. $20.

The lines here are never fast- not at the post office, not at the grocery store, probably not anywhere else. The drive time is always short but the store lines are eternal, so maybe it’s all the same.

Now I need to find authentic clothes that won’t burn in a fire.

Onward, ho!