I went to Guatemala City for a doctor’s appointment.

As I waited for my ride, a gentleman named Hector introduced himself to me. He was the guard in the building I just left.

He asked me “Where are you from?” I said “Here” and he repeated it again, except in English. I often say “Here” as a joke but Hector thought I didn’t understand the question. I answered “The US.” He said “oh!” “Well it’s really nice to meet you. So lucky to have run into you.” He asks me my name, tells me his. He asks me what I was doing in the building, was it a dentist appointment? and points to his teeth. I told him it was another medical appointment. I didn’t want to entertain the conversation anymore, he realized and bid me goodbye.

It was a kind, normal interaction. It could have turned creepy at any moment, it was teetering the edge, but it ended up being a brief, friendly chat. I wasn’t put-off or offended by Hector’s warm greeting, even if he just wanted to talk to a foreigner.

On the flip side, there are piropos.
Piropos are cat-calls. They are simply that. But they aren’t simple. Cat-calls aren’t simple.

I’m about to get on my soap-box.

I’m discovering, and embracing for the first time, that the implications of cat-calls, the mindset of the callers, and the response of the person being called are all layered. Simply, a person is being objectified and targeted. Simply, a person is being treated with disrespect. Ultimately, let’s leave the cat-calls to the cats and be grown-ups. Yes, they happen all the time but we ALL KNOW something isn’t acceptable because it’s normal.

Piropos are a constant reality for foreigners, especially foreign women, here in Guatemala. Yes, this is a loud, expressive culture. Yes, women are also revered in this society (in certain places and in certain ways: Mother Mary for example). But cat-calls don’t have to be a part of this culture for it to be vibrant, loud and revering to women. They don’t. If someone wants to tell you that you look nice, they can approach you and say, “Hello. I think you look very nice this evening” and walk away instead of whistling as they fly by on their moto.

It wasn’t until training that I really embraced the problem of piropos. It wasn’t until I walked to a church confirmation in a dress and heels that I felt objectified and targeted here. In that moment, I decided it was okay for me to be upset and affected. Training acknowledged the problem of cat-calls and unwanted attention, and encouraged that we see them for what they are.

It’s low-key harassment to disturb someone on the street because of how they look. There are a lot of assumptions here about people from the US, how much money or comfort we have, and this can encourage unwanted attention. Also as a woman walking alone, this makes you more vulnerable to that attention. If you are with another woman, you are still more vulnerable than if you are accompanied by a guy. It’s an experience that every peace corps volunteer and/or female PCV will have here. The gender roles in this country are very clearly defined and this is a man’s country, especially in el campo. Sigh #genderroles

If you are wearing modest business clothes instead of yoga pants or a mid-length skirt, you won’t get as much attention. But the second I was wearing a dress, I was getting “Hey Lady”s and “Where are you from”s and “Hola”s and “Hello How Are You”s as I walked to the church service. It was the body language, the looks and the attention that made me feel so uncomfortable. I don’t want to wear that dress again and by my consideration it is perfectly modest (and host-mom approved).

A part of me knows this is how it is and it isn’t going to change. There is a part of me that isn’t disrupted: the part that knows that cat-calls are a reality. But it is that same part that used to think that cat-calls were okay, even a “good sign” or a “self-esteem boost” for me. Now I know better. There is a world of difference between acceptance and rationalization. Now, I hope I can learn to accept that cat-calls are a reality without accepting that cat-calls are okay.

May there be Hectors to overshadow the hecklers. (heyo!)